I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Pants are for mortals
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Randomize
