You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
