Whod you bang
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize