I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Randomize
