Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
