arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize