I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I could fuck to npr.
Randomize