I'm really into asian looking animals
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Randomize
