guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
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