It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
I party with great urgency now.
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