We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
No...this little piggys going to the bar
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
