Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(314): View more from Missouri

I think i peed on brittanys purse

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(314): View more from Missouri

i wish starbucks made bloody marys

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(845): View more from New York

Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.

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(914): View more from New York

im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj

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(225): View more from Louisiana

thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.

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(210): View more from Texas

Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat

(830): View more from Texas

You are so not ready for motherhood

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(231): View more from Michigan

I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1

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(716): View more from New York

OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING

(319): View more from Iowa

YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT

(716): View more from New York

I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT

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(303): View more from Colorado

Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.

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