So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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