Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Randomize
