I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Every concussion has its silver lining
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
