how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
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