tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
i was born a porn star she said
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
He is an equal opportunity slut.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
The air taste purple.
Randomize
