just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
