Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Randomize
