"it" just moved
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
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