So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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