I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
