is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Randomize
