i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Randomize
