Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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