What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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