I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize