i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
