Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
How many fucks given?
0.12846
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Randomize
