i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
