i permit you to call me
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
