Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Randomize
