shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
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