Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
