I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
so let's talk penis.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Randomize
