Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
