I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
