she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
