Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
she peed on how many people?
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Randomize
