you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
My grandmother just called to say she disowned me. Apparently I uploaded a video to Youtube of me dancing nude with a blow-up doll named Dorothy, last night. You are so fired from being damage control.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
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