Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
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