I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
