Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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