I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
