I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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