weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
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