It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
