I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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