I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
