I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Randomize
