When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
